Wombtwin survivors carry a profound impression of their lost twin, at the deepest level of thought and feeling. This impression remains and will never be eradicated, and indeed there is no need to eradicate it in order for there to be healing. The process that really works is to make the whole story of your pre-born life with your twin real and true. Once the loss of the twin is accepted as a reality, then the normal grieving process can begin.
The process of doing this is known as the "wombtwin work". This is a process of self discovery and information gathering, helped by various simple ritual processes, which come in useful when inner exploration goes too deep for words. The process is set out in detail in The Healing Path, available from this site. Here is a brief summary of some of the stages:
SEARCHING: Recognise and validate your lifelong search for your twin.
SUFFERING : Take ownership of the emotional pain within you and consider how much of it belongs to others.
SURVIVOR GUILT : Do you deliberately do things that make you feel ashamed?
NEGATIVITY: Is there a Dark Twin within you? Do you have mysterious, paradoxical feelings about darkness and death?
EXISTENCE: Do you doubt the reaility of your own existence? Are you always trying to validate your own worth?
DESIRE: Why don't you want to want or need anyone? Do you switch off your natural desire for relationship?
CHANGE : Are you afraid of change? Do you know how to develop into the person you were created to become?
PRISON: Are you hemmed in by "musts" and "shoulds" of your own invention? Who can set you free?
POWER: Are you afraid of your own power? Do you believe it would be destructive if you used it?
CONTACT: Do you have the courage to reach out and make intimate contact with others? if not, why not?
LETTING GO: Your twin is dead and cannot be kept alive any longer in your vague memories. Time for a ritual of letting go.
SELF ACCEPTANCE: Forgive yourself for the sin of being the one who lived.
AWAKENING: Allow yourself to be the gifted and strong survivor. Get out there into the world and use your personal gifts to make a better world.
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